The Lucky Pumpkin

Happy new year everyone!!!!  Let’s hope that 2008 is an excellent year for all of us!   We managed to stay up for the countdown, but Bob is snoozing on my shoulder right now!  Poor guy, he had to get up at 4:15 for the early shift this morning.

Well, 2007, good riddance!  It was a year of transitions for us, all of which came with a lot of stress.  Let’s see, we moved from Detroit area to Rochester, MN, then again to the Twin Cities metro area, had a child, received a diagnosis of Down syndrome for her, two new jobs for Bob, and a move from working-outside-the-home-mother to stay-at-home mother for me.  All this in the last year and a half.  Oh yeah, and my first pet ever, Hercules the wonder cat, died on Valentines Day 2007.  He lived a gallant life.  He was 16 years old.  (I love you and miss you Herks!)  We have grown so much spiritually as a result of all of this stress, but hey, I am REALLY ready to just settle down to a somewhat normal life for a while!

Best wishes for a loving and peaceful 2008 for us all!

Merry Christmas, everyone! We went to Bob’s Grandma’s house for a nice lunch and for gift giving. The girls looked beautiful! Anna has been waiting to wear her party dress since Emily’s baptism in September. I really think that the anticipation of wearing the dress was stronger than the anticipation for the actual presents. She came down the stairs this morning and gasped when she saw the dress hanging there for her to see. It was so cute! She’s really into the princess thing. Anna and Emily got really nice gifts. Emily got a Down syndrome doll. It was made to have some of the common features that some people with Down syndrome have. I really don’t see it in the doll, except for the extra fold of skin around the eyes. I really appreciate the effort that her godparents made to get it for her, though. It was very thoughtful. Another interesting thing that happened today was that Anna really showed her competitive side, which I haven’t really seen before. Her cousins are going to be two and one in January. The one who is turning one can pull herself up and stand on her own. Anna came up to me and really wanted me to have Emily stand, too. It was really important to her. (Emily can stand with support, but that is all.) She also sat right next to Emily and protected her from the unstable movements of her cousin. It was so nice to see.

What is it about us Midwesterners that makes us want to do everything ourselves? (Stubbornness, perhaps?) “No, no, you don’t need to help. You just sit there and relax!” I know I shouldn’t complain about this, but it really bugs me that my husband’s family won’t let me bring anything for holiday meals. I can cook fairly well, and am an excellent baker. I WANT to help. Every time I ask what can I bring, and every time I am told, “no.” Now, I do know about the book, “How to Speak Minnesotan,” by Howard Mohr. (Hilarious!) In the book he says that in “Minnesotan” you have to refuse anything at least three times to show you really mean it. So, I make my offer the perfunctory three times, and then I’m told I can bring two dozen rolls! (And they don’t want the homemade kind, either.) I was told this at Thanksgiving, too, but Bob intervened and said that we have to have Senator Russell’s sweet potatoes (he loves them,) and that we were going to bring them anyway. (Then we were told not to bring the rolls because that would be too much! Seriously? I can’t buy two dozen rolls?) I know that some of you would say, what’s the big deal? So, you don’t have to do anything. Who cares? I know, it’s just the idea of the thing, and I want to make something with Anna’s help to show her what that part of holiday preparation is all about, and also to show her about being in a family, and helping each other out. It’s like being invited to a pot-luck, but being told to bring the paper plates. It’s kind of a put-down. Don’t get me wrong, I love my in-laws. We chose to move back to Minnesota to be near them, instead of near my family who has moved to Colorado. I really do think it is part cultural, because I was the same way with my teaching. When I put on a program, I really didn’t want anyone else to help. It is sooooo much easier to just do it yourself. Upon reflection, I can see now that this is selfish. Allowing others to help keeps us a community.

Last night I went to a county meeting for parents of children with disabilities. Actually, by the time that Bob got home, I had missed the meeting, but I made it in time for the best part, the dinner celebration for one of the mom’s birthday. It was refreshing, and a really nice group of people. I felt so happy that Emily has Down syndrome and not a condition that doctors can’t identify, or that doesn’t have a prescribed course of action, etc. One mother told me that her kids were diagnosed with “failure to thrive.” I am sure that is hard for her to not have a reason for her children’s condition. Two other mothers had children who have seizures. They said that for some of the kids, the medications don’t work, or only work for a while. I have much to be grateful for. There are so many people who have paved the way for families like ours, who have a baby with Down syndrome. One of the many professionals who talked to us in the first few days after Emily was born said something like, “I know this isn’t much comfort to you right now, but as far as conditions to be born with, Down syndrome isn’t too bad. There are well-established support and advocacy groups, a prescribed course of action, and there isn’t any fighting with insurance companies, or later down the road, with the government for social security/medicaid benefits, if she needs them.” I thought to myself, sure, that’s easy for you to say. You don’t feel like you just ran full-force into a brick wall! But now I totally see what she was talking about. I am so glad that we don’t have to fight insurance companies. I really don’t think I could handle that!

We went to a very nice party for the children enrolled in the Early Childhood Special Education Program here in town and their families. I was so surprised at how many people were there. It was a really nice event and I wanted to put out a public Thank You to the teachers and staff. There were about ten classrooms filled with activity centers. Frosty the Snowman gave the children books donated by the Jaycees. It was so nice to see everyone enjoying their children, and the teachers enjoying our kids, too. When I go to the local Down Syndrome Support Group, so many of the parents are negative and down on the teachers and the school district. I know that the meeting is their place to “vent,” but it has been hard for me to listen to the negativity. We were actually told not to get our daughter any extra help when she is in school, because then the district would not do all they needed to do to help her. Are you kidding? I will do WHATEVER it takes to help my daughter. If she needs extra help after school, she will get it. She will not be a pawn in the I.E.P. wars. I will never forget what a professor once told our class in my Master’s program. He lived in St. Paul and his children attended St. Paul Public Schools. When someone asked him why he didn’t send his kids to private schools, he said that he and his wife, (also a professor,) felt that they were their children’s first teachers, and that they were responsible for making sure that their children were learning what they should be learning, even if that meant supplementing their education. They felt the diversity of students in the public schools was a hugely important factor in their children’s education. I know that the day might come when I have to stand up to the district to get my daughter what she needs, but I will remain grateful for the talented and committed teachers who devote their careers to helping our kids.

What is up with the box elder bugs?  We were gone for two days, and we came back to six box elder bugs today!  When they first appeared this fall, I kept longing for winter so there would not be any box elder bugs.  However, that is not what happened.  I mean, it is December 14, and I found six bugs in my house?  Where are they coming from?  The temperature has been under the freezing point for all of December.  How do they survive?  Anyone out there know how to contain them?  I know that our house needs some “tightening” to keep them from coming in the cracks, but I was wondering if anyone knows how to keep them away from our house to start with, or out of the yard.  I know that they are harmless.  Bob calls them “cows,” because they are rather big, but they don’t really do anything bad.  (Except that my cat likes to eat them and then she throws up all over the place.)  Any ideas are appreciated!

I miss watching the Daily Show and the Colbert Report.  I hope that the writer’s strike is over soon!  I hate to say it, but sometimes the Daily Show is the only way I get any info on what is going on in politics.  You parents of small children out there know what I mean.  After the bedtime routine is done, the dishes, the laundry, and lately the Christmas decorating, or shopping is done, the news is already over.  (Or at least the informative part of the news which is usually just the first five minutes, but that is another topic!)

Speaking of the Daily Show, I would love to see them do something about how the Tigger character from the show My Friends Tigger and Pooh sounds a lot like Bush.   My husband and I were laughing about that today.  He changes words into “tiggerisms” such as “scarify” and “jump to contusions” (for jump to conclusions.)  I suppose that it is for the adult humor.  I do appreciate the addition of adult humor in the kids cartoons!  Which brings us back to the writers.  Let’s give them what they want.  They are clever and witty.  They deserve their piece of the pie!

Hi! I’m back! I am still trying to figure out this blogging thing! I would like to add some pictures soon as I figure all of this out! I just wanted to say that presents do not equal love. My mom and dad live in Colorado and we live in Minnesota. My mom is constantly worrying about the girls not remembering her, or getting to know her well enough. After staying with us for a month (yes, I did say a month!) she said, “Well, I hope the girls remember me!” Are you kidding? You lived with us for a MONTH!!!! Anyway, she just sent five boxes of presents for Christmas since my parents are staying in Colorado for Christmas this year. Yes, I have two children, and she sent FIVE BOXES of presents. It is just so sad that she feels that the girls will love her more if she gives them more presents than their other grandparents. It looks like I will have to do what I did last Christmas, dole out the gifts slowly over time. I will not enable the spoiling of my kids!